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The Mom Who Knew Too Much

The Mom Who Knew Too Much

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Category: teen bathroom habits

January 10, 2019May 7, 2019 Gila Pfeffer humor, mom humor, moms of teens, parenting, teen bathroom habits

Process of Elimination

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Wait, there’s supposed to be a 10%-15% no show rate, what the hell? I stumbled into the magical, shiny, subversively funny world of @humorandwine about a year ago and I’ve stayed here ever since. She’s got the best hair, the best smile, but most importantly, she’s got the best heart. Oh and her memes are 🔥. Follow @humorandwine . . . . . . #momaf #momproblems #momtruth #momlife #momlifebelike #thisismotherhood #mommemes #parentinghumor #sahmproblems #parentingmemes #parentinglife #sahmlife #birthdayparties #sickkids #parentinghumor #lifewithkids #hotmess #hotmessmom #momstyle #ohheymama #stayathomemama #parentinglikewoah #organicmoms #realmoms #momprobs #forrealtho #laughoutloud #momtruth #truestory #instamom
And sometimes with no hands. Just my teeth. Or a few toes. Follow the wise, experienced and fed up with the BS @mouthymomsclub . . . . . #momsbelike #onehandtiedbehindmyback #momaf #superwoman #supermom #igotthis #motherhood #parentingmemes #momtruth #instamom #memesdaily #truestory💯
Almost forgot to dig into the archives for #tbt but luckily I remembered just now and found this evidence of a bizarre blip in my life. . Here’s what you need to know about this pic: 1. It is 1995 2. I have yet to meet Phil 3. I’d recently learned how to blow dry my naturally curly hair straight 4. I’d gotten a version of the “Rachel” haircut (Friends) which morning one with curly hair should ever do unless they are prepared to be a slave to a hair dryer. 5. I am wearing a Jean Paul Gaultier (my fave designer) cardigan which I didn’t own, but borrowed from my best friend who “borrowed” (stole) it from her mother who used to be my boss till I quit to escape a mega toxic environment to work in the place where this photo was taken..... 6. I am an employee of a thriving midtown ophthalmology practice. 7. I work there because I quit my job in fashion on account of the fact that it was a real life version of The Devil Wears Prada.... only worse. 8. I am messing around in front of a Visual Field machine 9. I am doing that in response to the fact that I am tasked with the responsibility of performing visual field tests on patients of the practice despite the fact that I have zero medical training and my work experience and passion up to this point has been in fashion. 10. This is a rare photo of me NOT wearing a white lab coat. Normally I’d wear a lab coat to convey a sense of medical expertise that I did not have 11. A visual field machine is used to test a person’s peripheral vision .... I can’t f-ing believe that I was tasked with this responsibility 12. I lasted 11 months at this job until I realised that I needed to get back to fashion and fast. 13. I was given responsibility and learned lessons at this job that still inform me to this day 👓 I learned that you can and should learn something from every experience life throws your way, no matter how uncool. I was living in the city, my mom had died not long ago and I had bills to pay so I took the job. I learned a crap-ton and paid my bills and grabbed the chance to work for @misssixty the first chance I had. But that’s another post for another #throwbackthursday
Also applies to school drop off. I used to love winter for the sole reason that I could wear a big old coat over my pjs when I walked my kids to school. Still did it in summer, but the cost gave me a shred of dignity. @thedecentmother am wise tells it like it is which is why I love her memes. She’s pretty great too ❤️ . @thedecentmother . . . . . #wedontdothathere #hotmessexpress #strugglebus #momaf #playgroup #momsbelike #mombun #yogapants #messyhairdontcare #sahmlife #motherhoodunplugged #forreal #blackpanthermemes #keepitreal
I think @goldfishandchickennuggets has video surveillance equipment installed somewhere in my house cuz this is 💯 accurate. Follow @goldfishandchickennuggets , she’s funny, an excellent writer and she keeps it classy. @goldfishandchickennuggets . . . . . . #dumbanddumber #siblings #siblingrivalry #familylife #stopfighting #nightserum #viewmaster #80skid #nostalgia #nkotb #thisis40 #momsbelike #momaf
It’s like @healthylivingforhotmesses lives inside my head. Actually, I wish she did. I could change my inner monologue to her 100% positive, no BS allowed stream of thought and I’d be so much better for it. My head is waiting @healthylivingforhotmesses . . . . . . #positivevibesonly #getit #workit #stopprocrastinating #writersofinstagram #instamom #snarkyquotes #momblogger #sarcasm

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